Extra! Extra! Bras in the news!

Hey, look at the headline. Historical news is being made:

Charged, as I have been, with single-handedly keeping print media alive via the Internet, this was another happy day on task. Waiting for coffee to brew, I flipped through the business section of The Dallas Morning News en route to the sudoku. 

Why, bless my boobies! Hanesbrands now owns Maidenform on its way to becoming an evil underwire monopoly. This is big, big news, as it turns out average bra size is increasing.

More entertaining newspaper items were aquaponic gardening to feed a family of eight, and a seed library blossoming in repurposed card catalog drawers. It's obviously a Barnum and Bailey world, but it wouldn't be make-believe if I believed in WonderBra.

Now just imagine growing tomatoes in Madonna's bra. It gives tomato cages a whole new meaning. Voila!

Topsy-Turvy Tomatoes + MiracleGro + A Fish Out of Water  = WonderBra! 


Q. Wasn't Tom Hanks in a really dumb sitcom called "Bosom Buddies"?
A. Yes, with Peter Scolari back before "Newhart" and "Big".

Q. Isn't a subscription for daily home newspaper delivery getting pretty pricey?
A. Indeed. It's about thirty dollars a month.

Q. Won't the Bobby Book post tell of this blogger's very first crush?
A. Yes, but that will have to wait until after this bizoom update.

Q. Doesn't the blogger at Plano Prairie Garden have a better plan for tomato support?
A. Yes, he uses cattle panel.

Q. Why do reasonably intelligent people say "preventative" when they mean "preventive"?
A. I don't know, but it makes me crabby.

Extra! Extra!
They're drawing a red line
Around the biggest scoop
Of the decade...
A barrel of charm,
A fabulous thrill,
The biggest little headline
In vaudeville

Presenting...in person...
That 3 foot 3Bundle of dynamite...

© 2013 Nancy L. Ruder

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