The eyes have it -- disasters in simpler times

Fritzi and I saw "Airport" at the West O Drive-In during the summer of 1971. Mom must have read Arthur Hailey's novel. At least in my memory we sat in the '54 Chevy, but it might have been that awful Ford Fairlane.

Putting together a collage about my day picking up my new eyeglasses and shopping for wedding mother attire in Macy's at our formerly bustling mall, I had a vivid flashback to the snow-plowing runway scenes with George Kennedy chomping a cigar. Lights mark the edge of the tarmac. D.O. Guerrero, Dean Martin, and Jacqueline Bissett collide in the aisle of the doomed 707. A special evening with my mom before the ugly mother-daughter battles of late adolescence...when the rain began we continued to watch the outdoor movie with windshield wipers..

© 2013-2016 Nancy L. Ruder


Judi, Morticia, Camilla and Eliza

The search for appropriate wedding attire for MOG 3.0 continues with my team of advisers. Much like a search for the perfect sofa, I find so many nominees for the Most Hideous Ever award.

This week I cataloged the hardcover and downloadable editions of Game of CrownsElizabeth, Camilla, Kate, and the Throne, by Christopher Anderson, and scanned the color plates for guidance in my quest. 

Why can't the whole wedding party just wear tie-dyed t-shirts? I could hot glue sequins beads...

© 2013-2016 Nancy L. Ruder


Target with the Dalai Lama; commutin' with Putin

Groovy plastic lid slide-out under-shelf drawer from Target

 The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up is a hot title at the library No, I've not read it. My life-changing reorganization was inspired by my son's small, well-arranged kitchen, and a chance meeting with His Holiness, the 14th Dalai Lama.

The Dalai Lama was streaming live on my day off, explaining that change and peace will come from serious, continuous action, and then a little prayer. He said the diverse religions on this small planet are like a well-stocked supermarket. If there was only one religion there would be few customers in the supermarket. Education, connections with others, and compassion within ourselves are key to transforming the world in which the Orlando attack had just happened. He spoke of the importance of young persons and women in this effort.

The Dalai Lama has a delight-filled childlike sense of humor, and when I left for Target he seemed to be riding shotgun in the Buick and chuckling softly, his maroon robe flapping by the open window.  Emanating compassion and positive energy, he did not view my belated spring cleaning effort as a tiny pebble in a big stagnant pool of grime, but considered the organizing products with curiosity and wonder. When I got back to the apartment,  the Dalai Lama was not with me. I bet I lost him in the musical greeting card aisle, opening and closing the cards. Had to carry up the bags all by myself.

Another imaginary passenger, bobble-head Vladimir Putin rides on the dash instead of shotgun. If you need a powerful, absorbing audiobook for long commutes or a road trip, check out Red Notice, by Bill Browder.  Although the book came out in 2015, it's leading the nonfiction category for the next Coveted Nancy Awards.

Now, as often happens when I write, memories of my dad surface. This time it's his fondness for spiritual parodies.

Well, I don't care if it rains or freezes,
Long as I have my plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Through all trials and tribulations,
We will travel every nation,
With my plastic Jesus I'll go far.

© 2013-2016 Nancy L. Ruder


The Radish Project

Awake from two to four again, I pondered my recent radical escalating approval of radishes.

In these days of Hamilton mania, I remember how Gore Vidal's version of Aaron Burr informed me sleep would become a precious commodity at an advanced age. Consciousness of internal organs and aching joints in the middle of the night are what I remember about the novel thirty years on.

As my parents aged, the number of condiments in their refrigerator mushroomed. Why on earth did they need four kinds of mustard? Hmm. In the middle of the night I realize my fridge holds three.

How did life get so complicated? When did there become so many vegetables? Why does kale taste like grass clippings + styrofoam packing peanuts? And why have I never figured out how to make charts and graphs?

My former supervisor was a graph artist. She could make Venn diagrams and splatter graphs and info graphics I could almost understand and could have hanged over the sofa.

No data was harmed in these chart attempts. Plotting the complexities of historic breakfast preferences finally lulled me to sleep for another few hours.

© 2013-2016 Nancy L. Ruder

Manet at a loss with albatross

June is almost half over, and not going fast enough. The page on my Cornell bird calendar is giving me such weird vibes! Since I received two copies of the catalog one hangs to the right of my home computer, and the other to the right of my office screen. Seen from the corner of my eye, the image sparks elusive Rorschach images on my mind's eye. They are gone before I can catch them.

© 2013-2016 Nancy L. Ruder


Frosted Flakes Chatty Cathy

Technology demands upgrades. Upgrades demand online chats for service and support. 

Chat agent Can I have you turn OFF your device and remove the SIM Card.
Me : Okay.
Chat agentPerfect! Once your SIM Card is out let me know please :)
Me : do you have any hints for getting it to slide out?
Chat agentSure! You can do this with the back of an earring or a paperclip! :)
Me : now what?
Chat agent : 
I will ask you to blow on the SIM Card and the Sim Card tray please.
Me : LOL.  Done
Chat agentI know! I know! It looks silly! But I promise you it works! :) Perfect!  Can I have you insert the SIM Card in and then turn ON your device:)
Me : okay ...  android is starting
Chat agent: Yey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me : It let me call a number!!!
Chat agent : Seee! I told you it worked! : ) Test it out! :)

 Me : just like fairy dust!
Chat agentIt was all you! :) You see you needed to give life to your device! :)

Me: Good night with sleepy sands my dears! 

© 2013-2016 Nancy L. Ruder


His boy Elroy

What I will remember most about our Memorial Day visit to the National Aquarium in Baltimore is our rush to find the "Jellies Invasion" exhibit before closing time. We had the place to ourselves but so little time

The Woolly Mammoth had his giant fancy-schmancy camera. I had my old reliable Canon PowerShot. My future daughter-in-law was taking one-second videos with her phone. We were in a cave of wonders!

These Jetson jellyfish are Blue Blubber Jellies.

The only things missing were a tall glass of Fresca over ice, the Sixties Sunday evening treat while watching "The Jetsons" and "Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea" on the black and white t.v., and We Five singing "Beyond the Sea".

© 2013-2016 Nancy L. Ruder


Nobody expects the Yancey's Fancy gouda!

I failed to travel with the appropriate field guide for my adventures in D.C. and Maryland. Didn't realize cheese would be a recurring theme for the weekend, so I didn't check out the DK World Cheese Book.  

  • In-flight Cheese Nips on Southwest
  • Room 11's grilled cheese sandwich with marinara sauce for brunch with Oak Shade Cheddar, Fresh Mozzarella, Caciocavallo 
  • Dessert tiramisu with Mascarpone cheese and Marsala wine
  • Difficult to believe no cheese on the Ben's chili dog at the Nat's game. Sigh, but then
  • Italian dining on the deck with tomato mozzarella salad, "little ear" pesto pasta, broiled lamb chops, sweet corn, watermelon ...

Toto, I have a feeling we're not eating Velveeta anymore.

© 2013-2016 Nancy L. Ruder