Scrambled goldfish

"Maybe if you bought a goldfish your life would be more perky,"said the sneering plastic figurine balanced on my shoulder as I stared at the cracked egg 's happy yellow yolk. The coffee had not kicked in, and the fiendish bobblehead accurately read my perkiness deficit.

It's not pretty after a late night trying to win the next level on Ancestry.com. Your attitude stinks. Ain't nobody gonna tossle your hair and take you fishing, Opie. You can't keep hiding from current events in the upper branches of your family tree.

But still, there are some great names for imaginary goldfish in the high branches. Just today I found Keziah  Cooley. Elizabeth Knott Strange would be perfect for a molly. Patsy, Polly, and Phoebe are guppies. Maybe I should buy some neon tetras, since I have good names for them:

  • Bede is short for Obediance
  • Mitty is a nickname for Submit
  • Wealthy is short for paying the rent
  • Nellie is short for Eleanor
  • Bessie Veronica is just perfect for an early silent movie star
  • Minnie is short for Hermione
  • Hitty is short for Mehitabel

The coffee begins its magic. I could be Keziah Cooley, Private Detective.... 

© 2013-2016 Nancy L. Ruder

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